Being a Cishet Therapist for LGBTQ+ Folks: What That Means to Me 🌈

I’m a cisgender, heterosexual woman - and I don’t pretend to know what it’s like to walk through the world as an LGBTQ+ person. That’s not my lived experience. But through my work as a therapist, and through relationships with people I care deeply about, I’ve learned just how much strength, complexity, and courage lives within queer and trans communities.

And I’ve also learned how invisible that experience can be to those who aren’t paying attention.

Unlearning, Listening, and Doing My Own Work

Many parts of LGBTQ+ identity and experience aren’t always seen - especially in environments like families, workplaces, classrooms, or therapy offices. That invisibility can bring a constant undercurrent of fear, uncertainty, or exhaustion: Will I be safe here? Will I be accepted? Will I have to explain myself - again?

I’ve spent years unlearning the biases I absorbed - some from the culture I was raised in, some from my own family, and many that were so internalized I didn’t even recognize them at first. I take seriously the responsibility of doing that work - because allyship isn’t just about being “welcoming.” It’s about actively dismantling the barriers, assumptions, and blind spots that can make therapy feel unsafe or unhelpful.

What You Can Expect From Me

You won’t have to defend or justify your identity in our work together. I won’t ask you to educate me, but I’ll always be listening. You get to be exactly who you are, and I’ll meet you there - with warmth, respect, and curiosity.

I know that walking into a therapy space - especially as someone with an LGBTQ+ identity -can come with hesitation. That hesitation makes sense. Therapy hasn’t always been affirming. Sometimes, it’s been outright harmful. My hope is that our space can be something different: grounded in trust, connection, and care.

Even though I don’t share your lived experience, I am committed to creating a space where you don’t have to shrink or hide. A space where your identity is honored, not pathologized. A space where we can talk about what matters to you - without judgment or assumptions.

If that sounds like what you’re looking for, I’d be honored to work together.